Weblog

Monday, 22 June 2009

  • What to do, what to do

    Here's my situation:

    I've been applying to jobs all over the place. None of them worked out. As a last resort I applied to McDonald's. I can basically start whenever but the question is whether or not God wants me to work. I already have one job and I've calculated that the job will cover my car payments. But I need to have money for gas, unexpected expenses, Christmas and birthday presents etc. I didn't like the position I was in last year. It was God that I had enough to get by but I guess it's because I wasn't comfortable that I didn't like it. I see different needs in the world and I would like to give to them but my finances prevent me from doing so. I have to pay my car payment from month to month and the money I made during the school year was barely getting me by. I would like to be able to go out to eat from time to  time. (And by time to time I mean only once or twice a semester.) I'd like to be able to go shopping for a few items. I haven't even been able to shop for myself. I sound like such a self-centered snob.

    So basically this situation may be more like a faith issue. Do I have the faith that God will supply my needs for this upcoming school year? But at the same time it could be a wisdom issue. In Proverbs 6:6-8 it says:
    "Go to the ant you sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise: Which having no guide, overseer or ruler. She Provides her meat in the summer, and gathers her food in the harvest."

    So according to that I should be working in the summer, which I am but in order to provide my needs for the fall I should be working another job. The Word, especially proverbs talks about laziness. I work during the day which isn't that strenuous of a job. I answer maybe 10 calls during the course of a 5.5 hour period. After that I go home and chill. I may take a nap and clean my room but other than that I'm not being that productive.

    I just don't know!!!

Thursday, 07 May 2009

Friday, 01 May 2009

  • Does God have a fragrance?

    At Friday Night Fire, which is a worship service for college age adults, I smelled a scent. It was a sweet, soft fragrance. It smelled really good. I would smell wisps of it here and there. I tried to figure out what it was. My friend smelled it too. Then I got home and I can still smell it. Not constantly but every once in a while. I don't know how to explain it. It isn't me...believe me I smelled it. I'm wondering what this scent. I smelled a scent similar to this...it was when we had this cloths for healing at my church with a scripture on healing on it. They had a certain oil on it. That's what it smelled like. Since it wasn't constant I don't know it was God....I don't know....

Thursday, 30 April 2009

  • Domino effect.

    I'm realizing the weight of my sin now. Because I didn't cut off a certain friendship when I should have I am suffering the repercussions. These are somethings that I truly believe are the result of delayed (or dis)obedience:

    -not really belonging anywhere. I hung around this person all the time, where I was, that person was and vice versa. Now when I want to eat on campus, like today, because I'm not really tight with anyone else it would be like using someone to ask to eat with them at this point. (I asked one of my friends who is also an RA and she was my mentor when they were eating and they aren't until late which conflicts with my schedule.)

    -I feel insecure and I feel like I display a lot of the emotions and personality that this one particular person had. I often have pity parties and just feel alone

    -the shame of sin

    -lack of focus/bad grades

    It's amazing how we one thing can have an effect on so many other things. Because of my sin and disobedience I'm having to suffer. I would advise anyone, if you are doing what you know you aren't doing or vise versa, you better fix it. If not, you will be suffering the consequences like I did. You don't want to be in the position I am. Sometimes I can't believe I am the one saying this; I am the one going through this and giving this advice, rather than being on the receiving end. Sin is so not worth it. It has a catostrophic effect on everything. Don't wait until you don't want to do it anymore; just stop now. Ask the Lord to help you, HE will. Deny yourself. It's hard but it will be worth it. Seek the Lord's wisdom and will in all things. It's the best plan for your life.

  • Silence IS golden.

    I'm learning that more often than not, it is better (for me at least) to keep my mouth shut. Usually when I speak up, I end up wishing I hadn't, feeling my words have hurt or offended someone or made my self look stupid. From now on, I'd rather hear that I'm too quiet than to try to be something that isn't me and make a fool of myself. Maybe God called me to be a little more on the quiet, reserved side. Some people have come out of their shyness and I have to an extent but not all the way. Maybe this is just me, how I'm meant to be. I pray I never appear snooty by not talking much but I don't want to say some thing wrong either. I'm going to learn to smile more often and listen more often, really and truly listen. I usually regret the things I did say rather than the things I didn't say. So I'll just keep it hushed. :)

hazeL_eyed_mami08

  • Visit hazeL_eyed_mami08's Xanga Site
    • Name: Johnita
    • Metro:
    • Birthday: 2/15/1990
    • Gender: Female
    • Member Since: 7/5/2005

Weblog Archives

Don't worry - your calendar is here… to see it in action just click "Save" above and refresh the page.

About Me

  • I'm a freshman at Salisbury University I forgot/didn't know i had an Xanga but reactivated it. I dont even know anyone on here so whatever but i guess it'll be a nice place to post my business for those of you that want to know. I am a Christian by the way and I love Jesus!

Blogrings

[no blogrings]

Pulse

hazeL_eyed_mami08 has no pulse!...